A Word to the Wise (and Those Just Average)

Greg Asimakoupoulos and Seattle Pacific University President Deana Porterfield

So you’re about to graduate! Congratulations! As you probably know by now, I won’t be speaking at your ceremonies. I have a previous commitment. Besides, I wasn’t invited to speak. (Laugh here!) There are more deserving individuals worthy of that honor. However, if I had been given the privilege of speaking at your commencement, I would probably offer you the following advice…

This milestone in your life marks a lengthy journey of hard work. You’ve read more books than you expected. You’ve written more term papers than you thought possible. And you’ve taken more quizzes and exams than you thought you ever would.

But there is one big test you have yet to complete. It’s an examination that will last the rest of your life. When you walk across the stage to receive your diploma, someone will call your name. As they do, listen up. The mention of your name signals that you are deserving that long-awaited certificate of achievement. It will also begin the clock on what people will think or feel when seeing or hearing your name. And you alone can determine the outcome. That’s the test that still awaits.

I once saw a sign on a city bus that caught my attention. It was a challenge to employees to do their best every day they went to work. This creative motivational expression went something like this: “Every job is a self-portrait of the person doing it. So, autograph your work with excellence.”  That memorable quote attributed to Ted Key is a call to recognize that how you approach a task (no matter how small or big) is a reflection on you. Your name is on the line whenever someone associates what you say or what you do with you.

The name our parents gave us when we were born was their gift to us. It calls to mind that we are part of a family with whom we share a common name. Our shared name comes with a wealth of past associations and connections. “Oh, you’re so-and-so’s kid? Awesome!”  But that built-in credit isn’t bottomless. It’s always up for grabs. While our behavior and choices have the power to increase that credit, they can also deplete it. What we do and how we choose will bring glory or shame to our family’s name.

A legend about Alexander the Great and one of his soldiers illustrates this. A young recruit in Alexander’s army was overcome with fear and fled from the frontlines of battle. This deserter was caught running away and brought before Alexander. The general required the recruit to identify himself. “What is your name?” Alexander insisted angrily. The humiliated soldier whispered “Alexander, sir!”

Unable to hear the young deserter’s reply, Alexander asked again more forcefully.  “What is your name, soldier?” To which the soldier responded a bit more audibly, “Alexander, sir!”

Not sure he had heard the disgraced soldier correctly, Alexander the Great demanded a third time, “What? What is your name, young man?” At that the embarrassed recruit stood at attention and boldly answered “Alexander, sir! My name is Alexander!”

The esteemed general, shocked by what he’d finally heard, replied, “Soldier, change your actions or change your name!”

With that in mind, remember you take your name with you wherever you go. Leaving the comfortable confines of a familiar campus and venturing out into a rather complicated world, your name will be put to the test. Whether you go on for further education or join the workforce, you will be autographing your performance on a regular basis.

Keep in mind that your actions and choices will not take place in a vacuum. They will impact how others view you and the family from which you’ve come. Be proud of your autograph. In the process make your family proud!

The Foothills of Heaven

The cover of Greg Asimakoupoulos’ new book

The foothills of Heaven
this life has been called
marked by footprints
of what waits in store.
Eternity’s summit. Celestial air
and the promise of, oh, so much more.

The foothills of Heaven
invite us to climb
while exploring the beauty we see
in the love of a mate
and contentment at work as we wait for
what one day will be.

Every Day’s a Saturday!

The catchy slogan of many a retired person

Every day’s a Saturday
when you’re as old as I.
A weekend’s nothing special anymore.
Retirement means sleeping in
and coffee on the deck
before you do the things that you adore.

For me, it’s writing poetry
or taking photographs
or going for a long walk in the park.
For Peter, a new friend of mine,
it’s working in his yard
or blowing glass creating priceless art.

Such lazy days are not a waste.
When doing what we love,
there’s meaning and fulfillment in our play.
The stress of work is in the past.
Deadlines are six-feet-down.
No wonder every day’s a Saturday!

In Memoriam

The In Memoriam segment at The Academy Awards is a highlight

It happens so often.
Breaking news interrupts
and informs us of someone who’s died.
Blindsided, we Google
in search of the facts
that fake news can easily hide.

When Hollywood loses a star
that we’ve loved,
It’s not just the sky that grows dark.
We grieve for a friend
that we never have met
who has brought lasting joy to our heart.

Their death’s a reminder
that life is a mist.
Like a vapor it’s here and then gone.
But silver screen greats
can still be found in their films.
When we watch them, it’s like they live on.

A Day for Mother’s Mother

Greg Asimakoupoulos’ grandmother Olga and mother Star

Most Mother’s Day weekends we focus on our moms. But this year finds me thinking about my mom’s mom. After all, without my maternal grandmother, my mother would never have been born.  And come to think of it, neither would I.

Olga Birkeland was an amazing woman. She grew up on a farm in Keyport (Kitsap County) the second oldest of twelve children. Olga was not able to go beyond second grade because she was needed at home to help raise her siblings. Nonetheless, this daughter of Norwegian immigrants exhibited impressive mental acuity.

She taught herself how to play the piano, guitar and harmonica. A special memory I have is watching her play the guitar and harmonica at the same time with a harness around her neck. One of the songs she used to sing was entitled “The Little Soldier Boy.” This Civil War ballad told the story of a mother who welcomed a war orphan into her home after her own son was killed in battle. As she sang, I could picture my grandmother as the mother in the song. She had that kind of heart.

Olga’s faith was important to her from a young age. When two of her sisters died in their twenties, Olga found the means to navigate her grief by turning to God. It was through her church that she met an immigrant logger from Norway ten years her senior. Together Olga and Gunder raised three children to know and love the Lord. They concluded dinner every night with Bible reading and prayer. Their son became a minister and their two daughters married ministers. And as you might deduce, one of her grandsons became one, too.

Yes, faith was important to my grandmother. So was physical fitness. She was ahead of her time when it came to diet and exercise. She frequented her local health food store for vitamin supplements, wheat germ and natural sweeteners. No coffee for Nana. She preferred Postum (a cereal-based beverage) and Carrot Annie (raw carrot juice that she blended with honey and spices). She was a devoted disciple of Jack LaLanne with whom she worked out virtually via her black and white television.

And speaking of health, Nana insisted that visitors to her home (in which my grandfather had his office) not smoke. I still can picture the handmade sign near the front door that read “Tabacco is a filthy weed and from the devil doth proceed. It picks your pockets, burns your clothes and makes a chimney of your nose.”

 Nonetheless my nana was one of the kindest and most humble people I have ever met. I never heard her put anyone down. The worst thing she said about someone with whom she had difficulty was “They’re just a little bit different, that’s all!”

As I reflect on the qualities in my mom that I most admired, I recognize where they came from. My grandmother modeled for my mother a love for the Creator, a love for music and an appreciation of people. Like a runner in an Olympic relay race, Olga handed off the baton of meaningful qualities in such a way that my mom easily grasped them.

Sadly, my grandmother not only passed on memorable traits, she also conveyed to my mom a non-memorable quality. Dementia. Both of the women who shaped my early life eventually found themselves lost in the shadowlands of memory loss. And yet even when declining mental health robbed them of the past, I could look beyond the confusion of the present moment and see their loving hearts.

This weekend is a wonderful opportunity to honor your mom if she is still living. It’s a great chance to celebrate her memory if she isn’t. But why not take it a step further and recognize the contribution your mother’s mom played in her life (and indirectly in yours)? Leaf through some family albums. Share memories with your grandkids that you have of your grandmother. If possible, visit her grave.

I plan to blend some Carrot Annie and toast my Nana’s memory  for her contribution to my life.