Why the Love Boat’s newest berth is a controversial cabin

Tom and Katie had a kitten
nine months after they’d be bitten
by an alley cat named Lusty
who’s still running loose.

Is this Cruise’s destination
what’s in store for our great nation?
Growing up with unwed parents
who have no remorse?

Cruise, control your male desire.
Can’t you douse testosterone’s fire
‘till an altar candle flickers
claiming two are one?

Doesn’t L. Ron Hubbard’s values
voice the way to act and how you
navigate commitment’s voyage
anchored to your vows?

What became of rings then baby?
Can’t we turn the tide? Just maybe?
Or content to lounge on deckchairs,
we’ll watch truth capsize.